Put One Foot In Front Of You
I am a lover of all things Autumn. The crisp air that makes me breathe in deep, the array of colors on the trees, the smell of smoke from the fires burning in the chimneys of my neighbors, Chai Tea lattes that warm my soul, hoodies, comfy jeans, the smell of fall candles. (Though, I may be the only female I know who does not like Pumpkin Spice lattes.) I have been waiting for Fall since the first 90 degree day we had in February. I would enjoy Spring a lot more if we had one for more than a few weeks, followed by 5 months of heat and humidity. My hair rebels and my skin misses the dry heat of the West Coast. I get through the summer months focusing on what is great about it instead of what I hate. I love summer thunderstorms, lightning bugs, the carnival we go to on the 4th of July, sundresses, watermelon, no homework or projects for the kids (can I get an AMEN?!), and not having to find matching socks for the kids are what first come to mind. But, while I am excited for the arrival of Autumn, this year is bittersweet.
Jordan started middle school on Monday. My sweet, energetic, talkative, smart, creative, silly boy with the best laugh you have ever heard is in 6th grade and I am having all the emotions. I am mourning the loss of who he used to be while completely loving who he is, and am so proud of who he is becoming. Parenting is not for the faint of heart. I've always daydreamed that we could freeze our children at two different ages throughout their life and get to keep those versions of them, while letting the authentic one continue to grow. Right now would for sure be one of the ages I would freeze Jordan at. The way his eyes light up when he is telling me about a new character he has made up for a book he wants to write. Or how he gives me a shy smirk as he pulls up the back of his shirt and lays his head on my lap, non-verbally asking me to scratch his back. The way his nose
scrunches up when something is amusing to him. Or how he wants me to lay in his bed with him and just talk the night away, about anything and everything. I am constantly amazed by his intuition and complex thoughts for his compact 11 year old body. He is one of my most favorite people, and has taught me so much about myself as I parent him. And he is in middle school. Stop it. Slow down! He hugs me in front of his friends and waved sweetly to me as he headed into this next chapter of his story. I have not lost him yet.
Emmie Jane starts Kindergarten on Thursday, and those emotions are going haywire. I cannot
believe my sweet angel face is old enough for school. Her backpack is so big on her, it goes down to the middle of her calves. Her smile is just as big with excitement. She is both shy and social. Energetic and laid back. Brave and timid. Girly and curious. Silly and sweet. A walking contradiction that has completely stolen my heart. She is her mama's mini in almost every way. I hear my words come out of her mouth daily, especially when telling the boys to do something I've already asked them to do. She loves Jesus, snuggles, holding my hand while we watch TV, making up her own songs (watch out Taylor Swift), dancing, asking a lot of questions, drawing, and has a the sweetest soul. I have put on a brave face for her while talking about school, and have talked about all of the good things because she is a little apprehensive. I know she will make many friends, because she comes home with some when we go to the grocery store. She sees the good in everyone, and has a brilliant imagination. She is going to change the world one day, but we have to start with going to school first.
If only you knew The sunlight shines a little brighter, The weight of the world’s a little lighter, The stars lean in a little closer All because of you.
I want to see You lift your chin a little higher, Open your eyes a little wider, Speak your mind a little louder, ’cause you are royalty.
This is your kingdom, This is your crown, This is your story. This is your moment, Don’t look down..
You’re ready, born ready. And all you gotta do Is put one foot in front of you. Our ceiling is your floor, And all you gotta do Is put one foot in front of you, If only you knew. "Daughter" - Sleeping At Last
Good luck to all the kiddos starting school! And good luck to the Mamas (and Daddys)! Enjoy each and every season with your littles before they are not so little anymore. This is just another season, in life and the weather.